Movie and TV jokes

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An actor went to see a new agent one day and said, `You must have a look at my act, it really is innovative.'

So saying, he flew up to the ceiling, circled the room a few times and landed smoothly on the agent's desk.

`So you do bird impressions,' said the agent, `what else can you do?'

Rating: 2.6 |

What's the definition of a good actor?
Somebody who tries hard to be everybody but himself.

Rating: 2.8 |

Neighbour: Haven't I seen you on TV?
Actor: Well, I do appear, on and off, you know. How do you like me?
Neighbour: Off.

Rating: 2.2 |

A bit-part actor finally got his first leading role in a major film. In one scene the actor had to jump off a high diving board in to a swimming pool. He climed to the top of the board, looked down and promptly climbed down again.

`What's the matter?' asked the director.

`I can't jump from that board!' said the actor. `Do you know there's only one foot of water in that pool?'

'Yes,' said the director. `We don't want you to drown, you know.'

Rating: 2.8 |

Why does an actor enjoy his work so much?
Because it's all play.

Rating: 3.0 |

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